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I was completely and helplessly overridden with guilt for ten years

I became pregnant while a junior in college. I believed that my parents would disown me if I were pregnant and unmarried. Without further consideration or counseling I had an abortion.

I was told only that the decision had to be made within three days and if my blood was negative it would cost more.

The abortion was terrifying, gross, inhuman, horrifying, feelings of guilt and unbearable.

I was completely and helplessly overridden with guilt for ten years. Gradually, I began to be obsessed with the thoughts of being a cold-blooded murderer.

After the abortion, I asked God to forgive me. Nothing helps a person who has experienced this get over it or deal with it. It even took me months to complete this form.

I think my entire life situation changed because I altered the situation to try not to disappoint my parents. 

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