I know some choices are forever

I was single and about to enter graduate school in a different state. One friend knew; the father knew, but didn’t want to get involved in the decision process.

There was a required group counseling session that lasted 30-60 min. the day before the scheduled abortion. The only questions I recall were, "Why are you having this?" and, "Does the father know?"

The doctor had no smile. He did not want to answer any questions. He touched my abdomen. A nurse was there. He put anesthetic on me. I felt discomfort, but not any real pain. I was weak afterwards, but didn’t experience much heavy bleeding.

The one friend who knew no longer is in contact with me. Same with the father. I practiced what I can only describe as "deliberate amnesia" about it.

Just 2 weeks after the abortion, I met the man who is now my husband. I told him about the abortion just a month into our relationship. He is anti-abortion. He almost broke off our relationship (unbeknownst to me). I made a confession 3 years ago to my priest. His kindness and words of encouragement lifted an incredible burden.

I think I realize how precious all life is now. I understand how easily people can make poor choices, because information is withheld or social/peer/parental pressures seem overwhelming. I know some choices are forever.