That day 16 years ago, still is crystal clear today
I had physical complications -- had 2 young children -- was re-marrying. His
family pushed for abortion -- because I was in their home and they were to help
care for my children while I was bedridden. I felt obligated and totally
helpless.
The experience itself was horrible -- I felt as though I were walking through
a dream. A part of me died that day. It was terror, confusion, shame grief and
helplessness all rolled together. That day 16 years ago, still is crystal clear
today.
The abortion has left with me nightmares, self-hate and an even lower feeling
of self-worth and self-esteem. More mistrust from others than ever before. An
incredible isolated feeling -- a wall went up.
After becoming a Christian about a year later, I pushed this experience far
behind me. In the past year, God has brought this to the forefront and healed
me, guided me. "Stepping Stones" is a P.A.S. support group I founded after the
Lord gave me the wisdom and a message to reach others.
Without healing, it would have remained the single most painful event of my
life. Despite the previous sexual abuse as a child, physical abuse as a child
and from my first marriage, I came to the conclusion because of Christ's healing
hand -- what was lost has been restored. I have the privilege of extending a
helping, caring hand to others.