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I've had to learn to live childless…

I was involved in fornication before marriage with a steady boyfriend. We were using a contraceptive that failed.

A terrible mistake. Not something I got "away with" emotionally. Extremely painful, bled for ten days and my cervix was torn and had to be cauterized to stop the bleeding. Following - 12 1/2 years of emotional problems - unending remorse, guilt, self hate, flashbacks, nightmares, fear, anniversary depressions.

Bitterness, resentment and hate for my boyfriend, (whom I was going to marry) set in and destroyed our relationship. I walked away from him permanently three months after the abortion.

Life became too hard to live and I asked God to take my life. I received Christ into my life and have been healing ever since then. My life is now free from many of the effects of the abortion.

It took away the only child I ever conceived. I've had to learn to live childless. It ruined a relationship with a long steady boyfriend. It caused me to not trust men and not want to commit to another relationship. Sex became meaningless. I lost self esteem.

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