My heart weeps with you

  Karen
Texas,  United States
 
  It was October 1978 and I was married, but unhappy in that marriage.  I was contemplating divorce when I became pregnant. I didn't even hesitate to have an abortion. Without telling my husband, I went to the local Planned Parenthood Center.  I am not sure now, but I believe I  had to return the following day for the procedure.  I was 7-8 weeks pregnant, and I believe it was a D&C.  I remember the doctor showing me a series of instruments that got progressively larger and then a sucking kind of sound.  It was quite painful, but I did not even think about the child, only myself.  I was a feminist, pro-choice woman and thought I was just getting rid of a blob of tissue so I could go on about my life.

Even after I had a son, I was still pro-choice.  When I met women who were pro-life, I wasn't sure I agreed.  I tried to have more children, but ended up with first one tubal pregnancy and then another, each damaging one of my tubes.  I tried IVF and had four embryos but none "took”. All my life I had wanted lots of children and dreamt of having a large family, but it was not to be.  I don't know if the abortion was the direct cause of the scarring in my tubes or of various infections from sexual activity, but, either way, my hopes were broken across the back of my decisions.

It wasn't until I became a Bible-believing Christian that my heart began to change. When I started to see photographs of aborted children, I became a pro-life advocate and will never go back.  It was the grace of God through Christ that sustained me as I realized the truth of what I had done.

Deciding to be open about my abortion was not difficult.  I assumed everyone in America who got an abortion was as pro-choice and self-focused as I had been.   I thought they just needed convincing that they carried a real child in their womb. Until I found Silent No More, I didn’t know how many women were suffering long-lasting trauma from their experiences or decisions.   My heart weeps with you, and I thank you for sharing.

I am silent no more.

   
   
Priests for Life
www.priestsforlife.org