1. Did you always want to have a large family?
That's a definite yes; he wanted ten, I wanted 13. Now we realize the blessing of each child we had. Neither of us knew what it meant, because we don't come from large families.
2. How were you able to manage with so many children?
I remember someone asked me "How many do you have in diapers?" I think we had 8 children at the time, so I jokingly said, "Oh, all 8 are in diapers!" Actually, there are 18 months between them all. Seriously, in dealing with rude or silly questions, I try to answer as gently as possible. I don’t want people to think I’m bitter, and prove them right. The questions hurt sometimes - but gentle answers almost always turn the conversation around. People soften when you are gentle in response to an insulting question.
3. What recommendations would you give for family prayer?
The Rosary, as well as morning, afternoon, and evening prayer. The Angelus. Whenever a police car is driving by we automatically pray the St. Michael Prayer.
We pray for the Holy Souls if passing a cemetery. We say the rosary in the car- car time is prayer time. We try to get to daily mass. We do the Chaplet of Divine Mercy at 3PM. The children actually began this practice on their own. They are self-starters in prayer.
Fill your house with Catholic books. Books about the apparitions. Tan Publishers is good. Books by Mary Fabian, children's lives of the saints.
Fairy tales can be bad, but girls like princesses, and boys like soldiers and knights. If you are going to give them blood and gore and guts, give them the lives of the saints. Let them read about what drawing and quartering meant - the stories of courage, the braveness - the weakness, too - it is important for them to know about the humanity of the saints. The faith is so rich in holiness from everyday people.
4. Many moms I know (and fathers, too) have expressed both marvel and despair when they are faced with the challenge of having three young children at home. Why is this number the point at which parents seem to decide about putting an end to or continuing to have children?
By the time I had child #3 I thought, "Oh my goodness, I won't have enough hands!" We worry about silly things. All it takes is simple faith.
5. What is the hardest part of raising a child? Is it getting up at three in the morning to feed them or is it watching them survive the coming of age, which can be at times painful and awkward for them? Does having more than one infant or teenager make it more difficult?
We don’t live in Eden. We have to live in the world. I don’t shield my children from evil. I want them to face it but to understand that there is good underneath.
6. What is your opinion of daycare facilities, babysitters? What do you think about moms who want to continue working after the birth of a child?
The mindset must be not wanting the vacation at the ocean. When you hold your new child don't entrust them to other people. Don't deprive yourself of the graces of child rearing. Don't you want to be there when they take their first steps, or form their first words?
7. In what way is parenting a team effort?
We clash sometimes. He's the head and I'm the heart. My husband builds instruments and furniture, and he works at home, so he can keep an eye on things. Sometimes I feel inadequate because he is so on top of it. The children know how to behave and be quiet and should not be sold short. I do defer to my husband and this can be very convenient but on matters of heart I am the boss.
Incidentally, my husband was not Catholic when we met and married.
Our older ones were young when he converted. Everything changed when he turned Catholic - we were able to pray a bit more openly, and of course this united us even more.
