Priests for Life - Testimonies
Mothers Whose Babies Were Killed by Abortion

Fathers Whose Babies Were Killed by Abortion

Former Abortion Providers

Women Who Chose Life

Mothers of Large Families


Abortion Survivors

Children conceived through rape

Stories of pro-life commitment
America Will Not Reject Abortion Until America
Sees Abortion

Prayer Campaign

Take Action

Social Networking

Rachel's Vineyard,
A Ministry of Priests For Life

Silent No More Awareness Campaign, A Project
of Priests For Life

Clergy Resources



Finally, Post Abortion Stress Syndrome Exposed

I have had three abortions.  Each one was traumatic.  The first one - 1969, the second in 1978, and the third in 1987.  I seriously regret each and every one with every fiber of my being.  Why?

Well, I am grateful that you were led to this web-site because I want to explain the best I know how, why I regret 3 abortions.

Each abortion contributed to ill-emotional-mental health and eventually 17 years of ill-physical health.  The abortion experiences also affected my marriage relationships.  I've had three divorces.

Here is my story:  I was sexually active with my boyfriend in 1969.  When I got pregnant, I remembered what a girl told me - "hey - if your get pregnant, just get an abortion."  It was the thing to do in Northern California at the time.  In 1963, I fell smack-dab into the subculture of the sexual revolution.   There was a "do it if it feels good" attitude in society, and of course abortion was legal.  There was "anti-establishment" as it were; anti-authority attitude lingering in the dark holes of our war-weary society.  God was no longer allowed in our schools when I was 13 years old (1963).  The message of "free-love," "love child," "party hardy," "flower children," did not help me at all.  All of the above mentioned was a dead-end story.  It was the "me generation."

I was addicted to being in love, and I was hungry for a man's attention.  It wasn't drugs or alcohol, just the true love of a man that I focused my life on.

After my abortion, I married the man who got me pregnant and we divorces six years later.  By this time, I asked what really is the thing called LOVE?  I was very insecure, and my self-worth was near zero, and I was so ripe for Planned Parenthood

They convinced me my baby was a "blob of tissue" and that the procedure was called D&C.  This stood for "dusting and cleaning."  So simple - nothing to it.  The experience was a horrible 2-day stay at a County hospital, and I still have flash-backs whenever I'm in a bathroom, a doctor's office or an elevator, with a florescent light overhead.

The second abortion experience was not better.  I was so scared and so sick.  It was over in fifteen minutes.  My boyfriend who had wanted to marry me and have a baby took me home and I never saw him again.  Fear and anger was becoming a permanent fixture in my psyche.  This time the professional staff at Planned Parenthood who supposedly had my best interest at heart, told me that when I see the psychologist at the hospital to act mentally incompetent to withstand the pregnancy.  I was to cry a lot and then they would probably give me an abortion.  At this time I still believed my baby was a "blob of tissue."  Remember, this was all about ME - and this "problem" in my womb.  At this point there was no turning back; I wanted the problem gone.  The man I loved was gone.  Of course, I was crushed.  I found out later he was a man that with women "you love 'em and leave 'em."

The third abortion was unbelievably hard on my psyche.  I was a Christian by now, but was still so driven to find the man who would take care of me (and my three boys).  I went on a date, watching TV at his house.  We watched "Never-Ending Story." (how ironic!)  His little girl and my little boy fell asleep on the floor.  I laid down on this man's couch, very tired.  (I had gotten fibromyalgia and relentless fatigue at this time)  To make a long story short, my psychologist told me it was date rape.

OK!  Now I was pregnant - now what?  This man did not claim responsibility at first, but in a subsequent conversation he agreed to pay for one-half the abortion.  The Women's Health Clinic (the sign should have read "unhealthy clinic") was right across the road from my apartment.  How convenient!   I am so glad to report to you that now this clinic is no longer there!

The abortionist gave me a shot of something and sent me home.  I felt my baby die all night long! Cramping and more cramping, then violent cramping for 8 hours straight.  When I went back the next day I was sedated then had a D&C.  My baby was dead.

After 17 years of suffering from anxiety, low self esteem, physical pain and suffering, a myriad of symptoms including panic attacks, short term memory loss, brain fog, debilitating fatigue, shattered dreams, suicidal depression and prisoner-like loneliness.  I am now even still mending.

To illustrate God's grace: I found out that, from the time I walked into the Pregnancy Crisis Center for financial direction in 1987, until I came back to the same Center in 1994, for post-abortion counsel - was exactly seven years to the day.  Those were the sometimes suicidal depression days.  I could not for the life of me figure out what I was depressed about until I went through the P.A.C.E. program.  Then I finally understood why.

Seven years later, I became even more free when the prophecy I received from my pastor came true.  I had been in a cocoon-like state, always fearing people; even in church.  As the prophesy message said - no one person brought me out of it; it just happened.  Two days before the prophecy, I had an urging to by this beautiful silver butterfly pin that sparkled and fluttered!

I thank our dear Lord for the "Silent No More" Campaign and Rachel's Vineyard.  I am very impressed and excited for what I've seen and continue to see on Father Pavone's show on EWTN.  I know that my Jonathan, Amy, and Chelsea are with Jesus.  They will never suffer again.

I cried out as David did in the 51st Psalm, "have mercy on me God in your goodness, in your abundant compassion blot out my offense.  Wash away all my guilt; from my sin cleanse me.  12- A clean heart create for me God; renew in me a steadfast spirit.  Restore my joy in your salvation; sustain in me a willing heart. 19- My sacrifice, God, is a broken spirit."

God bless al my sisters and their men who have gone through the abortion experience and may they find God's mercy and peace.  May legalized abortion become just a faded dark memory in the PAST.


Priests for Life
PO Box 236695 • Cocoa, FL 32923
Tel. 321-500-1000, Toll Free 888-735-3448 •