I had always dated drug addicts. Finally I met this guy who was not an addict and I assumed my parents would be happy with my choice; I dated him nine months and got pregnant and began planning a wedding. My dad voiced his opinion about not liking this guy so I called the wedding off and broke up with him. Dad kept telling me if you want to get rid of this baby you need to hurry up before it’s too late. Eventually I listened and went through with it.
I just remember people outside the clinic handing out tracts and trying to give me other options and I walked on through without listening. I remember it being cold, a lot of hard hearted people and a lot of crying in the building. After the abortion I felt so dirty and ashamed and in pain. I think of this so often, it never goes away and as time goes on the more I want to meet my baby. I know that God has forgiven me but I am beginning to see that I need to forgive myself.
The other day I told God I wish I knew my baby's name and if it was a boy or girl; as clear as anything the Lord said "His name is Gabriel because through his message many will be saved" Wow I didn't expect to hear that but what a breakthrough that was for me.