I had an abortion because I did not feel that I could raise an additional child as a single mother.
During the abortion procedure I experienced an overwhelming sense of loss and mourning.
Immediately after the abortion I felt numb and felt dead inside. I felt that I had lost my soul.
As time went on after the abortion I felt and experienced the same feelings I had the day of the abortion and I never forgave myself and believed that God never would forgive me either. It felt like this huge weight of shame on my shoulders that I carried, that I believed everyone could see, and I felt alone, scarred and dirty. Untouchable, like a leper.
I found help and forgiveness through counseling with a friend that is a Christian counselor and in August 2012 she led me back to the Lord and Jesus cleansed me from my sin and all that I was feeling. I do have a multi-page testimony written that I have given in church and am willing to share it with others. In fact, I feel a deep burning desire to share my testimony and I feel the Lord calling me to do exactly that.